It’s not that there is a perfect formula or an exact art to healthy relationships, but there are some significant signposts along the way that can help you know you are moving in the right direction--towards differentiation of self, yet connectedness with others.

Even speaking and hearing the word “boundaries” brings up a host of reactions in many of us. In fact, many people are simply not comfortable with the term. If it feels awkward to even talk about setting boundaries, it can feel even more difficult to actually set boundaries. Not only can it feel uncomfortable, but for many of us it actually feels mean and heartless to even consider setting a boundary. In this way, the assertive action of setting boundaries often is interpreted as aggression.